Suspicion
by Smile the world awaits
Summary: Who pushed me off the boat and why? Reed Brennan is finishing off her vacation, but with more drama and Reed having yet another stalker will it ever be paradise again? There will be drama, but when will the showdown begin.
1. The Current

Suspicion

_The last thing I heard before I hit the cold, dark water was the sounds of gleeful squealing and cheering, as someone at the tables won big._

The crushing water enveloped me like a blanket and pulled me further and further down. I was fighting to stay afloat, fighting for my life. I couldn't see or hear the boat as it was heading in the direction of the shore, the direction away from me. This thought was the only thing that I could think, was this the end of me, was I really going to die out here while my friends had fun without me? I suddenly stopped fighting, I accepted that of all the near-death experiences this time I had no one to save me, Thomas was dead, Josh was with Ivy and Upton was who knows where with Poppy. I was alone, no one wanted me. I was sinking now, the warm ocean current pulling me away from the yacht, from the people I had unsuccessfully tried to be like. I thought about all the happy times I had, had with those people and slowly sank further down in to the black oblivion of the oceans floor. Darkness over took me.

NB! Please tell me what you think, I know it's short, but I didn't want to ruin it by carrying on.

**I do not own the Private Series!**


	2. The Coming

_Beep…Beep…Beep_

_That bloody noise was the most irritating thing I had ever heard in my life and it had been going on for hours on end!_

_Shut up! Shut up!_

"Shut up! Stupid bloody noise", I suddenly registered that I was somewhere that didn't look like heaven and I'm pretty sure a noise like that would be droning in my ear 24/7 if I was in heaven. I closed and opened eyes, double checking I was not in fact in heaven.

_Is this Hell? Why would I go to Hell, I'm not the one who pushed an innocent girl off a boat._

I snapped my head to the door, when I heard it open and saw Noelle, Kiran and Taylor walk in. They were all looking at the floor and didn't seem to notice that I was watching them. I tried to move slightly, but my body was too weak. But, the light movement that I did make Noelle noticed and her head sprung up, to look me straight in the eyes.

"Oh my gosh, Reed. You're awake", she said this in a whisper, covering her mouth and her eyes were filled with shock and happiness. When the others heard her, they too looked up; soon all three were surrounding me giving me one big group hug. I couldn't help but let out a laugh, but it sounded hoarse and strained.

"Oh, Reed you mustn't use your voice for a few days. The water damaged your voice box quite badly", Kiran said this in a way I had never heard before, it sounded motherly. I looked down remembering all the details of the night before or a few nights ago. Then I remembered Upton. Were he and Poppy together? What had happened when I was pushed overboard?

I opened my mouth to talk, but I couldn't get anything to come out. I closed it again and looked on my bedside table. I scanned the items that lay on the small table, and then I saw the writing pad and paper. I picked it up and scribbled _Upton?_ on the piece of paper, then showed it to them. A look of recognition covered their features.

"He's waiting for you outside, he was at your bedside until he couldn't handle it and he went to wait outside. Would you like me to call him in for you? He's been worried sick about you", Noelle said this and then with my agreement of a nod. She exited and so did Kiran and Taylor.

I waited a few minutes, then slowly my door opened again and Upton strolled in. He had so many different emotions in his eyes, but I could see that relief and concern were the most dominate. He stood by the door for a while and then with my motion for him to come closer, he slowly approached me. I tried to make him look into my eyes, but he was avoiding eye contact. Finally I gave up and picked up my pad and pencil. It read; _just tell me already! What happened between you and Poppy?_ He read it, and then took a in a big breath and released it.

"Nothing happened between Poppy and I. I went to talk to her and I told her to never follow us like that again and that it was immature what she was doing. I'm sorry it seemed like I was going to get back together with her, even though we were never really together in the first place. I'm just… so sorry Reed", after he said this I felt guilty for once again misinterpreting his signals. I reached for his hand and tugged at his hand to sit. He sat on the little bed that I wasn't using. I bit my lip; I didn't know what to do next. I guess I had to forgive him. I scribbled _I forgive you_ on the pad and showed him. A small, delicate smile framed his lips and he took my weak, frail body in his arms. I leant my head against his shoulder and he rocked me back and forth. After awhile my back started to hurt, so I untangled myself from him and lay back on the bed. I smiled at him and he mirrored it. Then he lent in and kissed me deeply, it was full of love, I could taste it on my tongue. He pulled back and looked me in the eyes, "I love you Reed Brennan, even if you really are a danger magnet", he smiled and I so badly wanted to say those words back. I was a about to try, but he put his finger over my lips, "I know", he said this like it was the best thing to ever happen to him. We were staring into each others eyes when the door flung open and I couldn't believe who was standing in the doorway.

_Who told him I was here?_


	3. The kiss on the forehead

**Thanks for all the great reviews and I very sadly do not own Private!**

_Josh. Josh? Huh? I was so pasted confused, that I probably looked constipated._

Josh had stepped into my tiny, cell like hospital room. He had a huge smile when he first saw me, until he noticed Upton and that Upton's hand was entwined with mine. I quickly pulled my hand apart from Upton's. Upton turned to look at Josh and then back to me with confusion etched into his features. I diverted my eyes from Upton's and looked at the floor on the other side of my room. I couldn't deal with this right now. I just told Upton I loved him, but when Josh stepped into the room I wished so much that Upton wasn't in the room. What is wrong with me? I met a really nice guy, who is drop-dead gorgeous too and who says he loves me, but then my ex steps into the room and I wish that my current boyfriend was far, far away from Josh and I. So, that Josh and I could be together, alone. Upton noticed this and he got up. To say goodbye he kissed me on the forehead. Josh was coming closer, but when he noticed I wasn't looking back at him, he turned and left. I was alone. Luckily I was tired, so I curled up and fell into a deep sleep. I wished I could never come out of this coma-like sleep, but I knew that reality would wake me up at some point.


	4. The Talk that Follows

**I do not own Private!**

A few days had passed and I had my voice back. Rejoice! But, now I actually had to talk to Josh about 'us' and the Upton and I 'us'. How fun. We had asked the school if we could extend our holiday a bit due to certain events of the past few days.

I hadn't seen Upton for the past few days, but Josh had been staying in the Lange's house, because as Noelle said, "I will let you stay out of the kindness of my heart", which Josh had answered with, "I thought you didn't have one". Every time I would pass Josh he would ask if we could speak and I would just point at my throat and quickly walk away before he could protest. But, now I knew it was time, I had to find out why he was here and then make my decision, Upton or Josh?

I walked out of my room and tiptoed down the passage to Josh's room. I rapped my knuckles against his door quietly, it was early and I didn't want to make anyone. Slowly he opened the door, saw me and let me in. I closed the door quietly behind me.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" He asked with curiosity melting out from his mouth.

I walked over to where he was sitting and plopped myself down next to him on the bed.

I looked at him seriously, "Why are you here Josh? You have no right to be here." He looked at me with hurt and guilt. He knew he had put me through pain that was even more excruciating than my "accident". He looked down then up at me again.

"Ivy and I are over", those were the most beautiful words I think I had ever heard. But then reality came crushing back down on me.

"Josh, we can't do this. I'm with Upton now, you told me you had to stay with Ivy and I moved on. You can not just come waltzing back into my life and think everything will be fine!" I was shouting in a whisper.

All I wanted was for Josh to have never come. Then Upton and I would be fine. I got up off the bed to go stand by his veranda; I looked out the window and put my two shaky hands on the think, cold metal of the banister. I took a few deep breathes to calm my nerves.

"Reed, I'm sorry I'm hurting you. But, even if you hadn't fallen or been pushed off the boat I would have come. I was planning it", He was now next to me and had taken one of my hands in his. I could feel the slightly rough texture from painting. They were so warm and fit perfectly with mine. I looked up and into to his eyes. I had no I idea what I was going to say.

I delicately pulled my hand from his tight grip.

"I have to go. I'm really sorry Josh, but I think you might be too late", and with that I left. I left the man who I probably should have stayed with. I left one of the loves of my life. Had I just made the worst mistake of my life? Or was it for the best? And would I finally be able to be happy without Josh in my life? I had so many different thoughts going through my mind as I took the longest walk of my life down the stairs of the Lange's home and out their front door. But, I couldn't help but smile, because if I had made the right decision, I was about to have the greatest night of my life and nothing was stopping me this time.

**Sorry I know the last two have been short, I haven't had much time to write :(**


	5. I Love Him

**Sorry it has been so long! I have just been really busy. But now I'm back so I hope you readers out there can review and help motivate me to write more :P**

**Also, as we all know I do not own Private, but I am a loyal fan as many of you are too.**

**___________________________________________________________________**

As I drove down the road that parted Noelle's house from Upton's, I couldn't help but have second thoughts about Upton and Poppy. Was I sure that they weren't anything? I hadn't actually seen Poppy since that night on the boat. I wondered where she was this time. Was she on some tropical island? Or was she just pretending to have left? Was she my stalker? It was the first time that I had actually thought about who had pushed me off the boat that night. I had been trying so hard to block it out. Was my stalker going to come back?

I arrived at the bottom of Upton's drive way and just looked up at his house for a few minutes. Was I ever going to really fit into this group? I turned into the windy drive way leading up to the beautiful house. As I arrived at the front of his house and quietly got out of the car. I fished for my phone, in my over sized Chloe bag. I carefully pushed the right numbers; I had learnt his number off by heart within 24 hours of our first kiss. The phone rang twice before he picked up.

"Reed?" He sounded like he had been sleeping and I suddenly felt really bad for coming at such a late time.

"Hey, were you sleeping?"

"Yeah, but I don't mind having to wake up to talk to you", I couldn't help but smile at that and look up at his room in desire

"Ok, so I have a little surprise for you. Come down stairs and let me in ok?"

"You're here?" He sounded so happy and it made me feel so good inside.

"Aha and it's really scary out here. So, hurry up and come and get me!"

I was now lying with him on his bed, just talking about random things and stealing little kisses once in awhile. I turned on my stomach to get a better view of him. He was just so perfect. I stared at him for a little while.

"Where's Poppy?" I asked him. He looked down at or hands and then looked up and straight into my eyes.

"I don't exactly know. The last I heard from her was that night on the boat." he said answering my question.

"Ok. Has anyone else heard from her?" I asked.

"Reed, can we just not talk about Poppy! I don't care about her and I don't want her back in my life if it means I will lose you." I looked at him for awhile wondering what to say. Then my mind began to think back to Josh. Would he have left me to go and find 'some girl' that night on the boat or would he have stayed with me?

And I just realised that Upton wasn't the guy I was meant to be with now. He was a holiday fling, but Josh was my love, my future and I couldn't change that.

Slowly I got up off Upton's bed and looked down at him.

"Upton, I'm really sorry but I have to go and I'm not coming back to you. I'm going back to Josh. I love him." I said my voice breaking and I knew I was going to cry.

"I'm sorry", then I leant down and kissed him and walked away from him.


End file.
